What is spontaneous sex? According to Cory Silverberg, it’s one of the biggest lies we’re told about sex. We’re told that to be real, sex must be spontaneous and that great sex in a relationship is the result of so much free-flowing lust that partners will be swept away by desire and be spontaneously caught up in wild sex. If couples aren’t having spontaneous sex, they say, their relationship will become boring and sexless. Good sex though, begins with desire which causes us to initiate sex because we want it and are thinking about it. That being the case, can sex ever really be spontaneous?

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